RIP James....

It's so strange how times passes by so quickly. It is so strange to think that I've lived for as long as I have, and that I will continue to experience life as such a fast rate. I can not even begin to explain the anxiety and disbelief I feel when I remember how old I am. Wasn't it yesterday when I was entering middle school, staring at my feet, shy and nervous. I felt so old then, as if I was entering a whole new world. Now I look at my self, and see that I've enter another world. Is "world" the right term? It's a hard topic for me to explain I guess.

For the past few days, I have been thinking about time and life. Why? For many reasons. There is one in particular that I have been thinking about though. It was one year ago today that I saw a friend of mine for the last time before he disappeared and took his life. That was such a hard time for all of us that I thought we'd never heal. It's weird though; I look around and see that life has moved on. Of course we miss him, and he'll never be forgotten, but it's very similar to the song "Without You" from the musical RENT. Even though the message of the song was that the two people missed each other and couldn't "live" without each other, there was another message that it expressed...Life moves on. It continues, no matter what happens. Isn't it a strange thought? Life is continuing. Even when everything in our world seems lost and hopeless, birds still fly, the sun rises, the wind blows, people are still driving to work, children are still in school, life keeps going. It almost gives me comfort to know this, yet this process still confuses me. I don't know, maybe I'm babbling now, sorry about that.

What do you think?

Anyway, I also want to respect my dear friend. Rest in peace James, a great musician, a great friend and a great Pokemon master.  It's so horrible that we lost you. You were always such a joy in every class. Everyone loved your smile, your humor and your extreme Bass voice in ear training, haha! That still makes me smile! One of my favorite memories of us hanging out was when we were deciding who was what pokemon. I wanted Mew, but was put as Chansey. You wanted to be Articuno, but were put as Rattata. I guess we both just wanted to fly. You're flying now James, you're flying now. We miss you.

James shall be honored in my memory as life goes on. Memory is one of our greatest treasures. It's something I take for granted way too much. It's the same with time and life. I guess I'm saying thank you for life, time and memories. Maybe I'm blabbing again. It's all very confusing, grief, mystery and time. 

Well, I guess that's enough out of me. Until next time, farewell! 

(RENT - Without You)